


Bearhemoth

by DivineNoodles



Category: BanG Dream! (Anime), BanG Dream! Girl's Band Party! (Video Game)
Genre: F/F, Fluff and Humor, Let Kokoro Crowd Surf, Short & Sweet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-14
Updated: 2020-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:14:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23138263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DivineNoodles/pseuds/DivineNoodles
Summary: Kokoro wants Hello, Happy World! to cover a hardcore death metal song, and it's up to the two resident brain cell-havers to save the day.
Relationships: Matsubara Kanon/Okusawa Misaki
Comments: 11
Kudos: 79





	Bearhemoth

**Author's Note:**

  * For [arienai (pikestaff)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pikestaff/gifts).



> Done as part of a fic trade! Hope you like it, Pike! \O/
> 
> CW: cheesily violent imagery/lyrics

> ##### BLOOD WILL RAIN FROM HELL
> 
> ##### AND DROWN THE FETID RATS
> 
> ##### SATAN COMES ALIVE TONIGHT
> 
> ##### CRUSHING ANGELS WITH SPLAAAAAATS

Misaki resisted the urge to cover her ears as she continued listening to the blare coming from Kokoro’s phone, which currently showed a video of thrashing, shirtless men doused in stage makeup screaming their heads off. Of course, three of the five members of Hello, Happy World! were listening with rapt glee, breaking out into cheers as soon as the throaty yells and screeching guitar riffs sputtered to a stop.

“That was incredible, Kokoron!” cried Hagumi. “I could feel that song all throughout my body!”

“Aye… I quiver with all the tremor and fury of Ares…” mused Kaoru, a hand clasped against her forehead. “The lyre of Apollo ne’er did soothe as softly as that guitar did rock… ah! How fleeting…”

“It’s great, isn’t it?” said Kokoro. “I’ve never felt so energized before! I had such a big smile on my face the whole time I was listening!”

Kanon -- who had been curled up in a ball a few feet away, cupping her ears to dampen the noise -- slowly rose to her feet, turning to face the dummies with a gulp. “U-Um… Kokoro-chan? Did you, er, understand what that song was about?”

“Nope!” Kokoro replied, shaking her head. “I don’t speak English!”

_ Figures…  _ thought Misaki -- she doubted Kokoro would be able to understand such a visceral and gory account of the apocalypse even if it was in Japanese.

“‘Twas truly a most lurid piece,” said Kaoru. “When they spoke of ‘red spilling unto bones of ivory’... what a romantic image. Cupid himself could not compose such poetry!”

“I definitely don’t think that was their intention…” muttered Misaki, her smirk twitching. She cleared her throat, ready to ask a question she already knew the answer to. “Er, Kokoro? Why did you show us this song…?”

“Because!” said Kokoro, spinning with her hands on her hips to face the rest of the band. “I wanna cover it for our next concert!”

Oh boy.

Misaki and Kanon locked eyes immediately. This wasn’t the first time that Kokoro had picked a song that was antithetical to the band’s sound for a cover, but… well, it certainly was the most egregious incident yet. Fortunately, their script for such an occasion was well-rehearsed at this point.

“Kokoro-chan,” Kanon began gently, “I don’t think that song would make people smile very much.”

“Really?” asked Hagumi, craning her head. “I had a big ol’ grin plastered on my face all while I was listening!”

“Me too!” said Kokoro. “I especially liked the part where the singer jumped into the crowd. I wanna try that sometime!

“Okay, but…” Misaki crossed her arms, trying to emit the biggest ‘stern-parent’ energy she could manage. “Do you think the old folks at the retirement home would be able to enable your crowd-surfing?”

“I think it’d get them up and moving!” said Hagumi. “I know that when I’m feeling down and out, nothing gets me going like some upbeat tunes!”

“Hear hear,” said Kaoru. “The vigor of our music may imbibe them with the will to live yet.”

“C-Can metal really do that?” asked Kanon, half-anxious and half-believing.

“No no, I don’t think anybody would have their life extended,” said Misaki. “We really shouldn’t--”

“Come on, Misaki!” cried Kokoro. “Let’s do it!”

“Pleeease?” asked Hagumi, pleading with puppy-dog eyes. “I wanna rock their socks off!”

Misaki was losing the battle -- she had a hard time resisting their innocent stares. Kanon swooped in. “M-Maybe we should have a vote? See who likes the idea…?”

“Ah, democracy…” murmured Kaoru. “How fleeting.”

“Great idea!” said Kokoro. “All those in favor, raise your hand!”

Kokoro, Hagumi, and Kaoru lifted their arms high.

“All those opposed?”

Misaki and Kanon barely raised their hands above their heads.

“The matter is settled,” said Kaoru. “The course of our destiny is well--”

“W-Wait!” Misaki yelped, scrambling for an out. “Um, we didn’t have a full vote! M-Michelle isn’t here!”

All three idiots gasped at once. “You’re right!” said Hagumi. “Where is she?”

“I haven’t seen her today…” said Kaoru. “Perhaps she is away on an important business trip?”

“Micheeeeelle!” called Kokoro, cupping her mouth. “Where are you?”

“I’ll, uh, go get her real quick,” said Misaki, nodding towards Kanon before ducking out of the room. Kanon stumbled on over before the three dummies, waving frantically to get their attention. “E-Er, I’ve been practicing juggling lately! D-D-Do you want to see…?”

“YEAH!” shouted all three at once, forgetting Misaki’s departure in an instant.

Gulping, Kanon pulled out three juggling balls and clumsily tossed them into the air, not even getting two up before dropping one on the floor. “Fuee…”

“It’s okay, Kanon!” saidd Kokoro. “You can do it!”

“We believe in you!” said Hagumi.

“Show us your talents, kitten,” said Kaoru.

Before Kanon could break down over their overwhelming support, Misaki burst back in, all suited up. “Hi hi! It’s everybody’s favorite bear, Michelle~!” She adjusted her slightly lopsided head before posing cheerily.

“Michelle!” shouted Hagumi and Kokoro simultaneously.

“Misaki, uh, told me about your plans,” she continued, injecting her voice with as much vigor as possible. “And I don’t think covering that song would be a beary good idea!”

“Aw, why not?” asked Hagumi. “Wouldn’t it be fun to yell like that?”

“We, er, don’t want to hurt the ears of our senior citizens, do we?” asked Michelle. “B-Besides, we still have to vote!”

“Oh, right!” said Kokoro. “All those in favor, raise your hand!”

Kokoro, Hagumi, and Kaoru lifted their arms high.

“All those opposed?”

Misaki and Kanon raised their hands above their heads. “Oh, uh, don’t forget Misaki’s vote!” said ‘Michelle.’

“By my count that would be… three to nothing?” asked Kaoru. “Hmm… perhaps the numbers aren’t falling into place. Alas -- my mind is overwhelmed by the task.”

“I’m counting five to nothing!” said Hagumi.

“It’s three to three!” said Kokoro. “Wow! A tie!”

“Wh-What do we do when there’s a tie...?” asked Misaki.

Her brain was churning as she tried to figure out what to do next when Kanon spoke up. “U-Um… d-d-doesn’t Michelle’s vote count for two?”

“Two?” asked everybody else.

“Y...Yeah,” said Kanon, forcing a squiggly smile onto her face. “It’s, er, um… a-an anti-bear-discrimination law. B-Because bears are underrepresented in government, their votes count for two.”

Misaki was trying to unpack the ramifications of that claim as the three dummies nodded in understanding. “Ah, gotcha,” said Hagumi. “That seems fair!”

“It’s important that bears get the political power to properly represent themselves as a minority!” said Kokoro.

“Ah, affirmative action… how fleeting…” said Kaoru breathlessly.

“Uh… yeah!” said Michelle. “So that makes the vote four to three. We’re, um, not covering that song. Sorry.”

Light moans of disappointment escaped the dummies’ mouths. “Aww… that would’ve been so cool…” mumbled Hagumi.

“Well, no use in dwelling on it!” said Kokoro, unfazed. “We’ll just have to find another song that we all want to play!”

“Surely it can be done,” said Kaoru, nodding. “We should consult Misaki on the matter. She has an extensive depth of knowledge on the subject.”

“Where did she go, anyway?” asked Hagumi, looking around.

“Uh… no idea!” said Misaki. “Maybe the three of you should go look for her?”

“You got it!” said Kokoro. “Let’s go, everyone!”

And with that, they stormed out of the room, calling Misaki’s name up and down the manor halls.

Misaki slumped against the wall as Kanon approached, smiling with relief inside the suit. “Phew… that was almost a disaster. Good thing we always have a way to work it out.”

“W-Well, you managed to save the day just… like… always…!” Kanon grunted as she helped pry Michelle’s head off.

Misaki laughed as she breathed in fresh air again. “Me? You were the one who came up with the clincher. ‘Anti-bear-discrimination law’? I’d never think of that in a million years.”

Kanon giggled lightly as she leaned in and gave Misaki a quick smooch. “If you weren’t around, I’d probably have panicked myself into a little puddle.”

“That’s my line.”

Kanon fell into Misaki’s large, furry arms, the two of them slinking until they landed on the ground. Misaki rubbed Kanon’s frizzy blue with a big gloved hand as she sighed. “That went about as well as I could hope, I guess.”

Kanon smiled. “Just another crazy day with Hello Happy, huh?”

“Yup,” said Misaki, smiling back at her. “I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.”

Kanon rested her head against Michelle’s chest, feeling the soft pink fur between her fingers. “Though… m-maybe it would’ve been a little fun to go a little death metal, huh?”

Misaki snorted. “Fun’s one way to put it. We should just be glad that we ducked that crisis. Now we can play at the retirement center without worry.”

Little did she know that Kokoro would prepare spiked, leather-belted outfits and lavish monochromatic makeup for them all to wear at the event. 

Fortunately for them, it turned out all the seniors were really into KISS.

...Maybe they didn’t need to worry about Kokoro’s whims as much as they thought they did.

**Author's Note:**

> If Misaki and Kanon simply realized the generational gap, then they would've understood that hair metal is _exactly_ what the old folks would love.
> 
> Twitter: @DivineNoodles


End file.
